I’m gonna live and live now
Get what I want, I know how
One roll for the whole shebang
One throw that bell will go clang
Eye on the target and... wham!
Don't tell me not to fly... I simply got to!
A huge hug for everybody!
"I like you," he says.My body is rigid."And I don't mean as a friend."It feels like I'm swallowing my tongue. "Uh. Um. What about--?" I pull my hand away from his. The weight of her name hangs heavy and unspoken."It's not right. It hasn't been right, not since I met you." His eyes close again, and his body sways.He's drunk. He's just drunk.Calm down, Anna. He's drunk, and he's going through a crisis. There is NO WAY he knows what he's talking about right now. So what do I do? Oh my God, what am I supposed to do?"Do you like me?" St. Clair asks. And he looks at me with those big brown eyes -which, okay, are a bit red from the drinking and maybe from some crying- and my heart breaks.Yes, St. Clair. I like you.But I can't say it aloud, because he's my friend. And friends don't let other friends make drunken declarations and expect them to act upon them the next day.
And suddenly, I want to touch him.Not a push, or a shove, or even a friendly hug. I want to feel the creases un his skin, connect his freckles with invisible lines, brush mi fingers across the inside of his wrist. He shifts. I have the strangest feeling that he's as aware of me as I am of him. I can't concentrate. The characters on the screen are squabbling, but for the life of me, I don't know what about. How long have I not been paying attention?
He said I'm beautiful, but I don't know if that was flirty, friends-with-everyone St. Clair, or if it came from someplace private. Do I see the same St. Clair everyone else does? No. I don't think so. But I could be mistaking our friendship for something more, because I want to mistake it for something more.
Espero que os haya gustado esta mini-reflexión acompañada por trozos del libro. Poco a poco quizá diga más cosas para complementar o quizá no. Todo depende del día y de mi estado de ánimo.It's nice holding hands. Comfortable.I wish friends held hands more often, like the children I see on the streets sometimes. I'm not sure why we have to grow up and get embarassed about it.